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The last time we spoke, I told you that I was tired of the toxic cycle I was stuck with you, told you that you were a mistake I regret, blamed you for the fights that I've had with my then partner. I called you names and said things I did not mean, but the part that got you the most was calling you a "mistake". You always doubted yourself as to why things could never work between us, you like to put the blame on the differences in our culture until I met someone else who makes it work with me despite it all. 

You told me never to run to you again when I go through another fight with him, begged me to block you so you can never reach out to me even on your weakest day. Then my egoistic self let you down yet another time and tell you that my I'de be much obliged to have you cut out off my life completely. 

Took you 3 months before you make fake accounts to follow the things I have been up to, to message me reminiscing the days we get high on adrenaline rush from the shootings, car racing, and jumpscares I forced you to. Your inability to accept that you could not treat me the way I needed made you falsely believe that I chose whom I chose over you becoz of the success, the money, the power he could offer. So despite your promises to never reach out to me, you cannot contain yourself when you got into GeorgiaTech, or when you got a new job and bought your own new apartment in New York City. It's been 4 years since the last time I saw you in person, yet here you are keeping track of my every stories and posts.

Boy, what are you scared of? 

You cannot possibly to scared of losing me when you never had me in the first place.

Is it an egoist wish?

What am I to you?


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